With only two syllables, failure, is a simple term. If you look at it long enough, its meaning becomes null.
I’ve never faced failure. I’ve been defeated several times. But, it’s taken time to admit that those defeats were indeed, not failures.
The point of this spiel is that the mere thought of failure brought me to create this website.
The past month has been tumultuous. I blamed the first two weeks on Mercury’s retrograde. That’s how exhausting it was.
Many of the things that occurred have resolved themselves. However, one particular instance has manifested itself into my dreams, thoughts, and, worst of all, employment.
Let’s begin with the fact that I’m rigid as hell –if hell considerably rigid–. Although life is certainly unpredictable, I like to make it as predictable as possible. Yes, *yawwwwn*.
I read the online menu before going out with friends.
I plan my meals and already have my weekend breakfasts pre-set.
I pre-plan my classes for each semester while I’m in the middle of one. With a detailed plan on how long it takes to walk in between them.
In conclusion, I LIKE (NEED) TO PLAN. It keeps me motivated. It keeps me sane.
Now, imagine how hard it’s been to discover that the summer internship I applied for 6 months in advance rescinded my job offer.
Since November 2017, I searched relentlessly for internships. In January, I applied to around 75. In February, I finally got an internship. It was a paid internship that was set to begin in May. I had to pass two phone interviews, one in-person interview, and a grueling writing test. It was no easy task. I was excited, I had my debts planned to be paid off with the money I earned. I planned to visit my family in Colombia before. I had everything planned.
Then, April 2nd came around. I received a phone call from the HR Representative in New York. I figured it was to plan my start-date and to discuss other matters. She sounded chirpy, but, then continued with the “I’m so sorry, but…”.
The rug was pulled from under me. I was already dealing with a car accident, a $200 traffic ticket, and $2 in my bank account. I really was not expecting another dose of bad news.
Long story short, my position was rescinded due to the “executive board’s decision to get rid of the internship program”.
I hung up, and I cried. I was in the middle of my school campus and I cried. I was really upset. I felt like I was dumped. Now, looking back, the news was not so bad. But, for someone like me, it hurt.
Now, it’s April 28th. Since then, I’ve applied to 80 internships. Have not received a word back from anyone. Why? Because it’s April. Only irresponsible people apply weeks before a Summer internship is set to begin. That’s the backbone of my qualms.
I applied in November to so many opportunities. But, I had to repeat the same process in April. Because my initiative wasn’t enough.
Now that I’ve applied for 80 positions with no word back, I’ve decided that it’s time to move onto other things.
Because of this, I now have a blog. If you’ve read this much, thank you.
I’m hoping that my blog will become my new passion and the home to my talent.
I haven’t written in a while. Hopefully, this new dedication of mine will sharpen my writing skills alongside my critical thinking.
Winston Churchill once said, “Success is not final. Failure is not fatal: it is courage that continues to count.”
I’m not a victorious wartime leader. But, I am someone with a passion for making things right. My dependence on planning stems from my fervor for progress.
On this blog, you’ll find several articles discussing politics, human rights, civil rights, feminism, and millennial and gen-z issues.
Along with those topics, you’ll also learn more about me as a writer and aspiring journalist.
If you’ve come this far and wish to learn more about the blog, myself, and my incessant need to plan, please see the “About” page.